So, you had another baby...

Dear friend,

You just gave birth to your second baby.  I am so, so unbelievably excited for you.  Babies are so wonderful. And what a blessing for your first child. As an only child, I truly believe that a sibling is the best gift. I promise that you will soon forget the pains of your latest labor and birth experience. You will fall deeply in love with your new baby, just like you did with your first.  There will also be many adjustments. I want to let you know that it is all going to be okay, but there are some things that you should know.

You may wonder (once again) if you will ever sleep again. You will. In time.  It is hard. So hard.  With your toddler running around you will not be able to sleep whenever the baby does.  You will be so tired. Enjoy any and all snuggles that you can, even if they are at 2 a.m.  Since you are always on the go, these days will pass even faster than you thought possible. 

Yes, the infant stage is hard. But, on the other had, there will be aspects that are surprisingly easy. I mean your new baby is not going to argue about what they are wearing when they leave the house. Or what snacks to pack. Babies are so portable! Remember the first time around when you were afraid to leave the house??  Baby number 2 will end up in all sorts of places that you NEVER would have even considered bringing baby number 1!  

Your toddler may regress a bit.  After all, you are paying all sorts of attention to this little thing that cries all the time.  You are carrying it everywhere!  Carry me!  I can cry too!!  Yeah...  That's hard too.  But it will also pass. It will!  

You will be perpetually late for awhile. Because you can't yet account for how long it takes to prepare two little people plus yourself to leave the house. As for leaving the house...you will want to go out!  To burn off some toddler energy and because that baby is so portable, and you are SO bored, but you will quickly realize how hard it is. How do you even grocery shop?  Bucket car seat in the cart plus toddler in the seat leaves very little room for groceries. Free roaming toddler can be dangerous. Tip: use the baskets meant for small grocery loads.  Put one under your cart and fill it up. Makes it easy to unload too. Alternatively...baby wear!  Leave the bucket in the car and strap that baby to your chest. :)

There will be times when both kids are driving you nuts. They are both crying for different reasons. Or maybe they are both sick (good times)!  It is completely okay for you to cry too. And to wonder if you really should have had another baby. How can you handle this?!  You can. Just not always. Ask for help. TAKE help. Even if you normally don't. 

Bedtime can suck. Oh boy. And I am saying this when I often have the help of another adult. Loosen up a bit. Do not stress. You will find your groove here too and you know how quickly baby sleeping schedules change. The world will not end if one kiddo gets 20 minutes less sleep. So, yes, try to make bedtime happen, but don't freak if it is later than you wanted to it to. Remember...perpetually late. 

There are good things too.  

Your heart will never feel so full as the first time they giggle at each other.  I have found myself driving on more than one occasion with my two in the backseat when a giggle fest breaks out.  It is as though they already have some secret way of communicating. Something that only they understand. I look back and they are just looking at each other and laughing. 

You will melt at bedtime when your first baby insists on giving the new baby just. one. more. kiss.  Or giving them a favorite toy. Or helping at bathtime. How could you possibly say no?  Let your first baby help whenever possible. Get a diaper. Bring a burp cloth. Sing baby a song. It will make them feel useful and included. Storytime is so much more fun with two littles snuggled close to you. 

Now let's talk about you for a second. I know how much you want to breastfeed. It will be easier and harder to give that a real go this time around. Easier because you have more experience, you know how it should go, you know it will be hard already. Harder because there's always that other little one. Hurrying you up. Wanting to do something else. Get yourself a big basket and fill it with some favorite toys and maybe some new ones too.  Go to this basket when you are nursing. Get down on the floor. Sit next to baby 1 with your trusty nursing pillow. Get used to multi-tasking. I have walked through my house with a nursing baby on top of a "my breast friend" strapped around me more times than I can count. Also...remember how your house was a wreck when baby 1 was born? And you ate the same meals out of the freezer for a week to survive?  Yeah... Things are going to be a lot messier this time around. At 6 months in, I still don't know the last time my floors were washed. Lower your expectations!!  You are doing an important job just keeping your children alive. The dishes, the floors, the laundry can wait. Again, accept help when offered!  And meal planning is your friend. 

The days are going to fly, my friend. There is nothing like bringing a new baby home to make you realize just how big your first baby has grown. You will hold up a tiny sock and think "you used to fit in this sock.  Now look at you."  It goes so fast. So fast. 

I will not tell you to "enjoy every moment" because you won't. There will be tears and messes and pee flying through the air!  And stress!  And worry!  But, if you can, find some joy in every moment. Some reason to be proud or happy or even relieved! It will make life that much more fun. 

You are going to have such a good time. I cannot wait for my littles and your littles to become friends. 

Love you all!

P.S.  A few notes about boys... Yes, you will probably get peed on at some point. They will start playing with their parts MUCH sooner than you would have guessed. And they generally do. not. stop. moving.  Enjoy. :)